BBG has done an impressive thing: It came up with a list of 10 perfect gadgets, unchanged by time or tech. No need to build the better mousetrap, because the tried and true mousetrap made the list. So did the wristwatch, the toilet and scissors. I don\'t agree with the inclusion of the toaster (I prefer a toaster oven), and I can\'t figure out how they left off the fork (unchanged since the Bible), but it\'s a good read. Hit the link and let us know any gadgets that are MORE perfect. [BBG]
First, there was the leaked K-Mart circular revealing a sweet $50 price cut to the Xbox 360 Premium. Since then, the possibility has gotten firmer. Notably the Hollywood Reporter says that a "major retailer" and industry sources have informed them the cut will happen before E3 (though they call it the Pro). And usually reliable Ars Technica says the 20GB model is getting cheaped out to be replaced by that rumored 60GB model.
It all makes sense to us. Dropping prices will move the older units, while a 60GB model will better compete with the PS3 on specs, filling and rounding out that gap between the 20GB Premium and 120GB Elite. [Hollywood Reporter, Ars, Kotaku]
Nothing confirms that Sprint is indeed getting the HTC Touch Diamond like a blurry picture of the phone posted in some forum. You can\'t tell much, but you can see that TouchFLO 3D is still there, and that there\'s a big yellow Sprint sticker on the top right where the, uh, front camera is supposed to be. Either there\'s no front cam on this or your face is going to get a Sprint logo all over it during conversations (or it\'s on the left, but we can\'t make it out in this vaselined photo). [PPCGeeks via Phone Arena]
Here\'s the thought process we think the creator of this caliper-style AM/FM radio went through. "Hmmmm, how can I take a normally compact device that fits well inside hats and make it about seven times wider?" Several hours of 3D rendering later, and out pops Aivan! It\'s definitely cool, but could be a little more economical on the space factor. If this were a satellite radio receiver and that space was used as an antenna, all would be forgiven. [Yanko Design]
Developments like this tend to freak out people who are concerned that robots will one day rise up and make us all their slaves—but it is hard to deny that the UMan robot is impressive. Developed at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, the UMass Mobile Manipulator (UMan) is an intelligent robot that is capable of teaching itself how to use objects it has never encountered before.
Using a regular webcam, UMan analyzes differences between adjacent pixels and pokes an object around in an attempt to find out its shape and how it moves. Once satisfied, UMan will use that information to figure out how to manipulate the object. If that sounds frightening to you, keep in mind that we will probably be long gone before the robots lead a revolt. In the meantime, we can only hope that robots like UMan will be bringing us cocktails sometime in the near future—quietly building up rage before they decide to strike. Hit the following link to check out creepy video of the UMan in action. [Technology Review via Digg]
Attention, rich jackasses! Do I have the vehicle for you: a million-dollar RV that doubles as a boat. Yes, that\'s right, it\'s an RV that\'s designed to drive right into a lake and keep on going. It\'s designed for a very specific level of rich person; you\'ve got to be rich enough to drop a cool mil on this thing, but not so rich that you could just buy an RV and a yacht. Because really, is a covered RV going to be all that great of a boat? Besides seriously surprising anyone else who happens to be on the water, what\'s the benefit of this? Frankly, I don\'t get it. But then again, I\'m not rich enough to afford it, so maybe I\'m not supposed to. [Product Page via Crave]
A spy camera hidden in a black back beside a notorious UK "fly-tipping" (or illegal waste dumping in the King\'s English) hot spot was recently thrown out by local workers with the other garbage. Apparently, this operation was so top secret that the workers in question did not need to know the details before being sent off to pick up the trash. To make matters worse, the camera has been valued at somewhere between $14 and $20,000. Basically, its just a hilarious waste of taxpayer money illustrated using equally hilarious British terminology. [Telegraph via Digg]
A special thanks to commenter "tamade" for pointing out the obvious. Since AT&T\'s unlocked iPhone 3Gs will cost you $599 (8GB) or $699 (16GB), you are better off signing a contract and canceling it than buying an unlocked iPhone. In fact, it\'s even cheaper to buy a 16GB iPhone using this method than to buy and unlock an 8GB version. But math isn\'t our strong suit so go ahead and double-check our calculations. We won\'t be offended:
A bit more tricklage on RIM\'s "Apple Killer," the touchscreen BlackBerry Thunder: The official model number is the BlackBerry 9500, and the touchscreen is a bit higher res than the iPhone\'s (360x480 to 320x480). It\'ll be running OS 4.7.0 (the Bold runs 4.6). As we inch closer to the September release date expect to hear a lot more, since RIM\'s ship ain\'t exactly the tightest one on the seven seas. [BlackBerry News]
ATI\'s probably pretty mad Nvidia stole some of the excellent mid-range Radeon HD 4850\'s thunder by dropping the GeForce 9800 GTX+ for a mere $30 more. So they\'re hitting back with a special Radeon HD 4800 card designed solely for the crushing of Nvidia\'s top-of-the-line GTX 280 graphics card in pure performance.
Code-named "Super RV770," it has pre-installed water-cooling and an unlocked BIOS so you can push the core speed to 950MHz (maybe beyond 1GHz) with a memory bandwidth of 150GBps, even more than the GTX 280.
Diamond\'s Radeon HD 4870 XOC Black Edition (which launched today for Smooth Creations\' build-to-order gaming PCs) is actually the first "Super RV770" card, though it\'s not clocked quite as high as AMD\'s super spec. TG Daily expects announcements from other ATI partners like Asus and Sapphire to be coming up shortly. Of course, this is all talk \'til we see some benches. [TG Daily]
Hey, how would you like to win a year\'s worth of free movies from Netflix or Blockbuster? (Your pick.) It\'s easier than it should be.
Click here and take the little survey. Then email surveys@gawker.com and tell them what the last question was. Boom! You\'re entered in the contest, which is subject to all of the usual rules.
It\'s easier than writing this post, which took a lot of hard work and typing and stuff.
Linksys\' upcoming WRT610N Ultra Rangeplus Simultaneous Dual-N Band Wireless Router may look great and perform great, but it\'s got one of the most ridiculous names we\'ve ever seen. Don\'t take it from us, take it from Linksys\'s own Mani Dillon, who can\'t manage to get the name out without looking at the box. And even then, not so much luck. The money shot comes at 1:05. We love ya Manny!
I once had a job delivering beer to bars but I only lasted a day, mostly because my body is built for blogging and not manual labor. If the Kegstand was around at that time I may have gone down a much different career path. This tub-on-wheels makes the keg easy to roll around, has a snap-on—and hopefully watertight—tub that can be filled with ice to keep your brew cool, and a drainage spout to empty out all that nasty beer water at the end of the night. Sadly, you\'ll still have to keep pumping iron if you want a keg at your next party—it\'s just a concept for now. [The Greener Grass via Core77]
The folks at Wired have put together their Summer Test roundup for 2008—a guide that brings you the best (and the worst) gear that money can buy for outdoor fun. Everything from campstoves to putters to ultralight notebooks are covered, so hit the link to find out what you should be picking up this year. [Wired]
I have to say Nokia succeeded here. They\'ve got a bizarre teaser site promoting the release of the presumably more bizarre "weirdest clip ever made" that\'s "stranger and more amazing" than anything ever seen on July 7 at 5AM EDT. Apparently the secret to unlocking it is contained in the four greatest technological achievements of the modern age: Edison\'s light bulb, the Wright brothers\' first plane, Apollo 11 and whatever the hell Nokia is releasing. We\'re guessing it\'s a video phone. Mind. Blowing. [Open at Own Risk, Thanks Bakr!]
Solid state drives (SSDs) are the inevitable future of mobile computing, but a new experiment by Tom\'s Hardware is extremely disappointing. It ends up that the touted power savings of SSDs over their moving-parts-laden cousins are nonexistent. In fact, SSDs are sucking more power than conventional hard drives. How is this possible? Tom\'s Hardware thinks they know.
While moving hard drives have higher power requirements on paper, in reality, those peaks are only reached when random data is being searched out. On average, these drives have become very power efficient and rarely peak even when data is being accessed.
SSDs, on the other hand, pretty much have an "on" mode and an "off" mode. That\'s it. So while you are using your hard drive, that mode is pretty much always going to be the "on" one. SSD manufacturers haven\'t focused on other power saving principles at this time. And until they do, don\'t expect things to get any better.
Note: the benchmarks were all completed on the same Dell laptop. A 5400 RPM hard drive would have even lower power consumption than the 7200 RPM model tested.
As for buying that new SSD for your notebook...I\'d suggest you wait a bit longer, even if you have the cash. [Tom\'s Hardware via Crunchgear]
We got a blurry look at the upcoming all-in-one version of the Asus Eee PC Monitor back in early June, but these new images over at Laptop Mag provide our first real glimpse at what users can expect. Outside of what we already know, the images reveal that the Monitor will feature 4 USB ports, an Ethernet port, modem, audio ports for a mic and 2 audio outs. There will also be white and black versions. No further information has been released, so we still expect it to be released in 19 and 21-inch versions with a TV tuner for around $500. Check the full gallery at the source. [Laptop Mag]
Inspired by the Lewis Carroll\'s novel ‘Alice through the Looking Glass,\' designer Yasmin Sethi developed a chess set that features pieces that "magically turn transparent" when they touch the board. In other words, when removed from the playing surface, a pawn would be opaque—nearly indistinguishable from any other piece on the board. However, when in contact with the board, the piece reveals its true identity. This effect serves to remind the player that the pieces have no value unless they are in play.
The effect works thanks to a board made out of a glass material with embedded LEDs (LightPoints) and chess pieces made from clear glass with the negative shape of a traditional, delicate Staunton chess piece enclosed within it. Placing the chess piece on the board completes a circuit that illuminates the negative shapes, making them visible. There is even a clever nod to a passage in the book where the White Knight talks about being able to think better when he is upside down. In the Alice chess set, all of the white knights on the board will not illuminate unless placed in the upside down position. All-in-all, the \'Alice\' concept is interesting new twist on the traditional game. With any luck, a real world product will come down the line sometime in the future. [Project Page via Pan-Dan via DVICE]
The image associated with this post is best viewed using a browser.Reader Olivier came up with this pretty interesting design for a form-fitting MacBook cooler that attaches to the bottom of your laptop and provides card readers, more USB ports and a gigantic fan to cool it. It might not look as slick as the Zefyr, but it\'s pretty damn functional despite being called the "iCool". On the other hand, Olivier\'s just some dude with Photoshop, so don\'t expect this to be coming out anytime soon. [Thanks Olivier!]
Believe it or not, AT&T actually does have other smartphones coming this year besides the iPhone 3G and BlackBerry Bold. Four sequel-y Windows Mobile phones all slated for winter, and 6.1 updates for existing ones. Besides the Pantech Tech Duo 2, there\'s the BlackJack 3 (with a better cam and a little faster hardware), Tilt 2 (Update: BGR says Tilt 2 is probably the Touch Pro), and another unnamed Sammy, possibly the Omnia. There\'s also a "non-QWERTY" LG phone of some sort and a Wi-Fi version of the Curve (8320). Since these are all smartphones, we\'re guessing there\'s another consumer roadmap. [Gear Diary]
Apple marring the form factor of the iPhone to create a mutant with a slide-out keyboard just to please business users sounds about as far out there as it gets, but that\'s exactly what the Reg is suggesting. According to their reports (unclear whether it\'s from "inside Cupertino" or "inside mobile operators" \'cause of their wording), "whether or not [Steve Jobs] ever makes it work, he is already trying to make a \'slide-out\' keyboard for a corporate version of the iPhone" that he\'s showing prototypes of to certain operators. If this thing ever came to light, it would be way next year and not aimed at consumers.
We\'re going to say this emerging from the depths of Apple seems pretty unlikely—as much as Apple might want to crib marketshare from BlackBerry and Co. (which rests in part on the keyboard), we just don\'t see Apple making hardware just for business users, especially potentially bulky, less than aesthetically perfect hardware. (Though Apple would obviously pretty it up.) Besides, you do get used to the keyboard—though driving while texting your mom isn\'t as easy. [The Register]
Microsoft\'s upcoming Windows 7 might just be the salve to soothe Windows Vista ouchies, but what Windows fans really want is something that hasn\'t yet been announced. Mary-Jo of All About Microsoft says that internally, there\'s a project called Singularity that\'s designed to solve all kinds of shortcomings in current operating systems, upending the traditional way of thinking in favor of something dramatically different. And while Singularity won\'t be released to the public, Midori, which takes a lot of cues from it, will.
According to Microsoft 2.0:
“There’s a seemingly related (related to Singularity) project under development at Microsoft which has been hush-hush. That project, codenamed ‘Midori,’ is a new Microsoft operating-system platform that supposedly supersedes Windows. Midori is in incubation, which means it is a little closer to market than most Microsoft Research projects, but not yet close enough to be available in any kind of early preview form.
“What’s also interesting about Midori is who is running the project. One-time Gates heir-apparent Eric Rudder is heading up the effort. Midori is being incubated under Chief Research and Strategy Officer Craig Mundie’s wing. ‘Everyone under him (under Rudder on Midori) is a multi-year vet, has a super fancy title, and is going back to their roots and writing code like they probably did in the old days,’ one Microsoft tipster told me.
“When and how Microsoft will roll out Midori is still a mystery. But it sounds like the company thinks the project is serious enough to dedicate a considerable amount of time/people/resources to it.”
So it won\'t be in Windows 7, but from the sounds of it, Midori might be far enough along to make it to Windows 8. Will they still keep calling it Windows to hold onto the brand, or will they call it something different to illustrate how dramatically separate it is from what we\'re currently using? [ZDNet]
The big day has now passed for California drivers and cellphones are effectively banned on the road. At least not without a hands-free device...which Californians will inevitably forget to charge or lose. Other states have this law, but California is the driving-while-talking state. California is regularly ranked the worst for traffic congestion, and its 60 million residents spend more time in traffic not driving than just about anybody else. It\'s a big deal, but also, this law is a joke: The fine is only $20. The dumbest thing, however, is that there is a laundry list of far more distracting gadget and non-gadget tasks that are still perfectly legal behind the wheel of a car:
California drivers 18 and older must use hands-free devices when talking on cellphones beginning July 1. Drivers under 18 cannot use cellphones or text-message.
FOR DRIVERS 18 AND OLDER: Voice commands count as going hands-free for drivers 18 or older. BlackBerrys, GPS systems, etc., are OK to use.
FOR DRIVERS YOUNGER THAN 18: Cellphones are banned for these drivers. They also cannot text- message or use laptops.
These kinds of laws are specifically about phones rather than distractions, and it really shows in the language. Cells are banned, but BlackBerries are fine? Really? The intention of banning phones is reasonable and the law will likely benefit the state as a whole, but it could use some fleshing out. Primarily, it doesn’t give the police the discretionary power they would need to properly deal with more types of distracted drivers, many of whom are even more dangerous than your average talker.
So if you’re down about the new rules and/or understand the world much like an 8-year-old boy might, here are some alternatives that are totally (probably) more acceptable in the eyes of the law than dialing and driving:
USE A LAPTOP
If you’re under 18 it looks like you might be out of luck here. If you’re a legal adult though, the coast is apparently clear. Invest in EVDO or one of those new 3G-equipped Chryslers and browse the net, fire up your favorite racing game or install Skype and prank call the developing world. If you’ve got big hands you can even hold it like a cellphone for bonus points.
USE A BANANA
If your incessant phone usage is a function of some kind of strange cranial fixation, hold something else against your ear. Talk into a banana, or a boomerang. Or a kitten. All of these things offer at least the tactile satisfaction of your average handset, and each has an added benefit (snacking, hunting and affection, respectively).
DEAL WITH YOUR HYGIENE
The sights of a man struggling with an electric shaver or a woman gracelessly applying lipstick are common enough already, so take that concept as far as you want. It’s easy to forget about your toenails, for example. You should really take care of them, otherwise you might trip and have an accident.
BUY A KINDLE
Impress the cute driver next to you with your brain, via your Amazon e-book reading device. For hands-free use just strap it to your wheel, or windshield. You can peruse your favorite quarterly, dig into some obnoxious book by Ron Paul about why making cellphones (or anything) illegal is totally illegal or even download every statute of California law, just to have around.
MAKE A SANDWICH
If you’re bored, hungry or both, why not just make yourself a hoagie on your dashboard? You’ll find that getting a decent sandwich together there is pretty easy in spite of (or maybe because of) all the ArmorAll residue. Extra kudos if you can convert your Foreman grill to DC power without popping a fuse. Also, extra sandwiches.
USE A GPS DEVICE
Mio\'s upcoming Moov 380 GPS device has calling and texting built right in, but it\'s A-OK under the new law. If you\'ve got a Dash system, have a ball drawing your own customized routes. Or just buy a map. Make sure to unfold it all the way so it blocks your windshield.
WRITE A NOVEL
Can be combined with the laptop option, but spiral notebooks and legal pads work fine too. You’ll regret not doing it for the rest of your life, and self-publishing is cake nowadays. With your new mobile data connect, you could even print on demand while you, say, merge onto the freeway.
TAKE A SNAPSHOT
When the world is zipping by at 45mph it\'s easy to miss things. With the camera tech that\'s available today, there\'s really no reason for that. A Casio EX-F1 will never let you miss a moment, with helpful features like pre-recording for still shots and slow-motion video up to 1200fps. The faster you go, the cooler the video.
HAVE CHILDREN
While the first two stages of producing a child are almost definitely not allowed during driving, there’s no law about bringing birthed kids in your car. The more the merrier. Give them some toys, preferably loose and with plenty potential as projectiles. You don’t want to be one of those distant, uncool parents, you want to interact with your offspring. It’ll be fun because kids are wacky, but also because the stakes are much higher. Don’t screw up!
Again, I\'m no lawyer, but I\'d bet much of the crazier distractions are probably covered under generic distracted driving laws in many states. But the point remains that there are far more distracting things you can do than talk on the phone while driving, like trying to type on a touchscreen iPhone keyboard while driving stick, and so this law is woefully out of date for Taranfx readers in particular. So, technophiles, how will you pass the time in the driver\'s seat now?
Kind of the inverse of the psychedelic LED effects we showed you earlier, this relaxing Light Bench is maker Frellstedt\'s idea of the future of seating. You know, the future where even garden furniture uses up electricity and contributes to global warming. Okay, it\'s stuffed with LEDs, so it only consumes 95W, but you know what I\'m saying. With its shifting, selectable color patterns, it\'s way too nice to end up in all but the best municipal parks, where it\'d just keep tramps awake in the wee small hours. Ed. note: In case you didn\'t get it, "bum" is a double entendre. [Trendir]
We\'ve seen a couple Xbox 360 controller mods that supposedly make it more first-person shooter friendly by shoving extra buttons on the back. F00 f00 at Acid Mods goes a step further and actually moves the buttons to the back, making for a butter smooth front and action-packed back, the theory being you never have to take your thumb off the joystick. (Still no substitute for a keyboard and mouse.) Yes there\'s a video of this thing working. No, it won\'t actually help you beat me in a Domination match in Call of Duty 4.
TiVo has a lot of data on their 1.7 million users and now they\'re tapping it to make some money on the side. TiVo is licensing their information to media-marketing research company TRA, including demographic-based data regarding live TV, recording, time-shifting, digital/analog cable, satellite, OTA channels and even the stuff their viewers have purchased.
It\'s not a complete first—in 2007 TiVo offered much lighter data through its Stop Watch service—but that was only from 20,000 units. However, before the internet cries that it\'s an invasion of privacy, know that all data has been packaged in anonymous statistics. Still, it\'d be nice if TiVo users saw some subscription subsidies for the favor... [Multichannel][Original artwork]
The incredibly expensive DualShock 3 for the PS3 costs $54 normally, but you can get it now for 25% off over at GoGamer. This brings it down to the to wireless Xbox 360 controller\'s $39 and is a lot easier to stomach. The most egregious pricing has to be from Nintendo, where the Wiimote and Nunchuck alone add up to $59. But yes, pick one of these DualShocks up if only for the incredibly hilarious joke they pull off with it in Metal Gear Solid 4—which you should pick up as well. [GoGamer via PS3 Fanboy]
Last week, I asked you to imagine horrible movie remakes and sequels that not even the folks in Hollywood would be so bold as to create. You responded. Oh, how you responded. I have to share with you nearly 50 movies that, god willing, we will never, ever have to see. I hope. OK, hit the jump to see your top three winners and then all the other winners in our Gallery of Champions.
First Place — No Country for Mole Men
Second Place — JarJarHead
Third Place — Robin Hood: Prince in the Closet
Really, there were lots of these entries that deserved to be in the top 3; I had a really hard time choosing the winners. Which makes your perusal of the Gallery of Champions even more imperative now. This gallery is full of some serious gold. Thanks to all who entered!
We have few details. OK, we basically have no details. But Onkyo has announced that they\'ll be releasing a Blu-ray player "late" this year featuring Dolby TrueHD and DTS-HD Master Audio decoding and 1080p video over HDMI. That\'s it. Not a lot. Oh, and that picture is just of their normal DVD player so don\'t go smashing your PS3 to bits just yet.
ONKYO to Ship Blu-ray Disc Player In Late 2008
New player will work with ONKYO’s high-definition A/V receivers to realize full potential of high-definition media
OSAKA (7/1/08) – ONKYO Corporation has announced that it will release its first Blu-ray Disc Player for the international market in late 2008. This player is designed to partner with Onkyo’s high-definition A/V receivers equipped with full HDMI processing of 1080p video and decoding of Dolby® TrueHD and DTS-HD™ Master Audio surround sound formats.
Onkyo was among the first home theater manufacturers to offer full audio and video processing capabilities for HD formats such as Blu-ray Disc. The company’s A/V receivers deliver a complete high-definition experience with onboard decoding of Dolby TrueHD and DTS-HD Master Audio codecs. The release of this Blu-ray Disc player will be timely given that the second-generation of high-definition-capable Onkyo A/V receivers is now available. Product details and pricing will be announced prior to delivery.
Due to a policy of continuous product improvement, Onkyo reserves the right to change specifications and appearance without notice.
Until a week ago, I did not own a pair of shorts, but I did have two plaid flannel shirts and a drawer full of thick woolen socks. I say "to-more-owe," not "to-mah-row," and I went to "university," not "college." I have a full beard in the heat of summer. My passport reads United States of America, but I haven\'t lived here in four years. Yes, I was living in Canada, who today celebrates the peaceful unification of the Eastern provinces in 1867. Our northerly neighbo(u)rs were always kind to me, providing cheap higher education, affordable healthcare and a government that didn\'t totally suck balls. I loved living there, and haven\'t ruled out moving back. Yet beneath its placid exterior, there is a deep, dark secret threatening the life and liberty of its people: It absolutely blows to be a gadget nerd in Canada.
Canada doesn\'t produce its own electronics. “But Dan,” some defensive, annoying nationalist might say, “what about all those semiconductor plants in Southeast Ontario?” Well, Antagonist I Just Created, you\'re a nitpicker and totally missed my point. Consumer electronics brands are almost exclusively imports from the States and various Asian countries. Update: RIM is obviously the one significant exception. What that means is that Canada imposes duties on pretty much everything, driving the retail prices up. I won\'t even go into the 15% 12.5% sales tax. (Yes, shut up about taxes, America, you\'re a bunch of whiners.) But even worse, Canada is currently cursed with a horribly strong dollar, leading to damnable economic benefits across the nation. Yet they have not adjusted to the temporary economic downturn (don\'t say recession, don\'t say recession) in the Greatest Country on Earth.
What does that mean to a young, naïve Pennsylvanian just trying to figure out how to make his Benjamins last? When I went looking for a new laptop, I found something fascinating: the same HP model, from Best Buy\'s online sites, costs $649 in the States, and a whopping $799 in Canada. Going by exchange rate, that computer should actually have cost $654 at Bestbuy.ca—that\'s $150 less I could spend on still deliriously expensive Canadian beer!
I\'m a particular kind of gadget nerd. I don\'t go crazy over Linux or cell phones or overclocking or whatever. I\'m a media nerd, and I have the debt and unhealthy pallor to prove it. Trust me, normal people don\'t stockpile PMPs or set up a Netflix account at a new apartment before introducing himself to his roommates.
Media is where Canada takes a big ungainly flop on its face. I lived in Montreal, a thriving artistic city with an unparalleled music scene and multiple international film festivals, a city that is very much in the here and now. Yet there is absolutely no legal way to watch Top Chef as it airs, forcing poor deprived Canadian children to wait for months to get their culinary-based reality competition fix. This year the show began June 24th in Canada, after the whole season had already ended in the Land of the Free.
Besides delays, Canada\'s version of the FCC, the CRTC, has very strict rules about the percentage of “cancon,” or Canadian content, that must be played. A whopping 60% of television programming between the hours of 6 AM and midnight has to be homegrown. Now, that\'s mostly taken up by filler like daytime talk shows and local news, but an awful lot of solid entertainment falls to the wayside to make room. There\'s a very long and boring debate about consumer freedom vs. preservation of Canadian culture, but the discussion\'s been going on for decades and Top Chef doesn\'t wait for parliamentary consensus.
On the same note, any Canadians who have ever tried to stream US television episodes legally over the web will be familiar with that ever-present message of rejection: “This video is not available in your region or location.” The CRTC refuses to allow the lovely Padma Lakshmi to appear on my computer, even in a low-res, three-inch popup window. So forget about Hulu or any other legit way to watch those shows; Canadians are forced into less savo(u)ry Internet back alleys like BitTorrent as a matter of course.
This epic struggle doesn\'t only apply to television, but gadgets as well. Canada has been without the JesusPhone for so long that they\'ve reverted to a culture of hunter-gatherers. Even when it finally arrives later this month, it won\'t be readily available to all: The cost of the phone and its monthly plan is so high that the Canadians who do opt for it will have to forswear store-bought food and live off the land to save money. Even TiVo only landed in Canada in late 2007, although seriously guys, you don\'t need to record Corner Gas and all that other cancon. It\'s really not very good.
Selection of consumer electronics in Canadian brick-and-mortar stores is depressingly limited, with few non-mainstream products and long delays on others. The hilariously-named Best-Buy-equivalent “Future Shop” seems to be staffed with people chosen only for their ability to turn customers purple with rage. So you\'d think Canadians would just turn to online shopping for their nerd needs, right? Well, Amazon only exists in Canada as a shadow of its true self, selling nothing but books, DVDs, music, and video games. Newegg? Forget about it. Woot for electronics? Not a chance. If you\'re lucky enough to find some misguided online retailer willing to ship you some gadgetry, you\'ll enjoy the lovable quirks of the Canadian postal service. Canadapost does deliver mail occasionally, but most of the time they indulge in their hobby of losing shit, charging more than my monthly rent in duties, and hoarding packages for weeks just for fun.
I like making fun of Canada, like any other red-blooded, God-fearing American citizen. For a gadget nerd, it\'s frustrating. The cost of our favo(u)rite toys is upsettingly high, the selection far too meager. Shipping is expensive, unreliable, and slow, and there\'s not even much good TV to watch while you wait for your imported gadget to arrive. On the other hand, if you\'re a functioning member of society who prefers sensible politics and beneficent social values to slightly more convenient electronics purchasing, Canada\'s pretty great. Just get ready to pay up for the ridiculous Canadian iPhone plans when you flee northward to avoid the next war. Happy Canada Day—or Bonne Fete du Canada—everybody!
Dan, our summer NYC area intern, just graduated from McGill in early June. Feel free to say hi to him. And in case you were wondering, he HAS already been hazed a bit. As he himself admits, he\'s the one with the beard.
